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Friday, August 26, 2011

"Disguise"

I was minding my own business, just sitting at my computer doing the usual things when I became aware that the bottom line of my email was wavering and burning my retinas. With a quick expletive, I rapidly turned off the computer monitor, grabbed my required supplies, and ran to the couch, ramming on my sunglasses in transit. Penny happily hopped onto the couch with me and nestled against me with her happily concerned expression. She likes couch time, but can still work up a little bit of sympathy for my miseries.

No tv, no music, no computer. The technological world has ended.

The next step was to assess the actual damage. What parts of me hurt, and how badly? Would it pass, or did I need to contemplate my pharmacopoeia? I watched the pretty neon colors passing in front of my closed eyes and wondered if there was any meaning to the geometric designs flashing by. Sometimes I think the colors are the 1’s and 0’s of my internal computer system breaking down or rebooting. I’ll spare you the more unpleasant details of my misery. I rammed my thumbs into the back of my skull and hoped for the efficacy of pressure points.

That’s a migraine. That’s a light one to tell the truth. The really miserable ones are the same but worse, and often include the evil gremlin who sneaks up behind me with a blunt axe or gets in my face with a sharp ice pick. I hate that gremlin. I’m going to throttle him if I can ever catch him.

Illustration Friday’s word of the week is “disguise”, and while I made this art the other day just to record my demons, “disguise” seems kind of apt to me. Migraines can obliterate my ability to see the world, which is a much more effective disguise than someone wearing an eye patch and a pirate hat. In another way, sometimes I think migraines are my system’s way of shutting down so I can look internally instead of externally. How real are any of the things we see in our over bright world? Everyone wears their masks and we neglect to think about that until we’re reduced to throbbing blood vessels and exposed nerves.

I had been doing pretty well with migraines lately. Someone recommended taking magnesium several months back, and while I wasn’t sure if it was helping or not, I’ve been taking it until I recently ran out. I thought living without magnesium might let me know if they were actually helping or not. The answer? YES!!! Magnesium helps!!! I now have a full bottle and am resisting the temptation to swallow half of them in an attempt to rebuild a curative level in my system.

The text on migraine information in this piece is from Women's Health.

26 comments:

  1. Glad it was a mild one Linda, I really do sympathise as I have a husband who has suffered all his life with migraine. When my daughter trained as doctor she recommended he try triptans rather than the beta blocker he took for years. Fingers crossed these have been pretty good so far.....
    Despite your poor head you still manage to put out some pretty cool artwork...your picture is very "eye" like, or have your been watching too much TV and got "square eyes"!!!Have a great weekend,
    Jane x

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  2. So sorry that you suffer from this condition, Linda. My husband also experienced severe episodes, and has found that limited amounts of the "trigger" foods and an occasional visit to the chiropractor for adjustments have helped immensely.
    If it's any consolation, I do think you captured the experience in a beautiful way, artistically. I just hope you don't have to visualize this again any time soon! Peace to you this week, and a pat to Penny for being a good friend! :o)

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  3. Thanks ladies! I used to have some wonderful pills for migraines but my doctor took them away with vague threats of potential heart attacks. Sometimes I think I'd prefer the heart attack? I took some artistic liberty in making it square, and I have been wondering what kind of food could trigger things. There's something wrong when Penny actually enjoys my misery!

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  4. Maybe I should clarify that. Penny enjoys the cuddle on the couch time. I don't think she actually wants me to feel miserable.

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  5. My sympathies, Linda...my honey gets migraines occasionally too (but much less since he switched to all uncooked foods). Clearly, no fun...and I think you are exactly right about it being a 'sign' to look inward instead of outward. Wise woman! :-)

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  6. You captured the lighting that comes with a migraine.

    I suffered from migraines for years and then they stopped. I get them now only under great stress. They're back.

    Sending gentle hugs and warm compliments...great job on this.

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  7. I used to work with a copywriter whose wife suffered. You could tell if she was having one because he'd be whispering into the phone... Wish you all the success with your ability to ward off the migraines... :)

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  8. Magnesium is great,uh? We should suggest it as an Illustration Friday theme! :-)
    Indeed when the outward eye needs a rest, the inward eye helps us to gain wisdom and insight.
    Very well written.
    Get better soon!
    Paula

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  9. Sorry for you pain Linda. My son suffers as well. Glad to hear that the Magnesium really does some good. It’s pretty neat that you can translate the suffering into a very interesting work of art. The true artist suffers for his work. God bless.

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  10. Well, I've got the suffering part down anyway :) Thanks for all the good thoughts everyone! I was a little iffy today, but things are getting better. I think the magnesium is starting to work for me again. Or it might've been that brownie?

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  11. Heisann!


    Hope your pain has ceased, and you can see colors and pattern without a headache. Migraines do bad harm. I suddenly read your comment above. Good news ;:OD)
    Still your illustration is beautiful, as we say in Norwegian: Ingenting er så galt et det ikke er godt noe noe!
    Have a nice week ♥

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  12. I'm better, but still wimpy. My apologies to everyone for being slower to respond this week.

    Thanks for the good thoughts and thanks for the follow Susan!!!

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  13. I had to take my tylenol and a baby asprin combo this morning as well. Just a bad headache though and not a migrane thank goodness.

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  14. ouch!!... migraines must suck !... hmmm.. you are right this scenario sure would take you into your inner self... it's interesting you made me think how I would cope if I couldn't see..
    no computer, movies , no art :( ... god bless the ones who are blind AND happy people.. gee whiz... counting my blessings right now!!

    Hope you are back in full swing real soon!

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  15. Yet another thing we have in common, Linda! My aura is more lozenge-shaped, but the facets & focus-blindness are the same. And of course, the ensuing pain...

    I gave up gluten 5 years ago (diagnosed with CD) & it has really helped cut down on the migraines. Lots of water also helps. They still show up now & then though. Ugh!

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  16. Hope you are feeling better Linda, Can't believe you still managed to create even with throbbing blood vessels:)

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  17. I created during one of my breaks in my miseries, and sometimes my aura is more elliptical too. Seems like they're either straight lines of geometrics or oval crystals. But I don't want to give up gluten. I NEED cookies! Thanks for all the nice thoughts everyone! And yes, I am feeling much better. I think the magnesium is kicking in again.

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  18. I can relate...I see a pixelated kind of crescent shape sometimes as a migraine aura. Glad you're feeling better!

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  19. I like how you look on the "bright side" of your migraines - your system's way of shutting down. I also get these auras, and find your illustration very representative! (Strangely, while I get the auras, I don't get the pain of migraines. I do take magnesium every day, so hmmmm...) Glad you're feeling better!

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  20. Linda, when you catch the migraine gremlin, hold him down long enough so that I can HELP you throttle him! I feel your pain--I had migraines, too--the same, blinding kind. My best advice is to have a big cup of coffee and run your wrists under cold water (old advice from my Dr. dad).
    So sorry you suffer, but your artwork, so obviously, does not. Lucky for us!

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  21. You've done very well with your representation of a migraine. I've only suffered the occasional one luckily. I remember watching a program about a women ridding her regular migraines with drinking lots of fresh vegetable juice... I guess if you're desperate. Hope they leave you alone so you can get on with your beautiful creativity.

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  22. I'm usually stuck in my pity party for myself when I think about migraines, but I'm getting the idea that there's a lot of people out there suffering from the same problem. I hope everybody feels better!! Thanks for the comments everyone!

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  23. Wow, when you said you made this to record your demons, I thought you meant as a journal page, but I can also see it as the aura-- I have only had two migraines ever, and separately two auras without the migraine ever materializing, and one of the auras was just like this-- a view with a hole.

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  24. Two migraines is two too many. Thanks for commenting Krista!

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  25. Hey Linda, well the good nes is, I once read that only really intelligent people get migraines - ever since I have been wondering why I do not get them :) :) and I once read that really intelligent people have terrible hand writing.... and I have noticed that, after I read that my hand writing has grown steadily worse .... self fulfilling prophecy? It's a classic migraine drawing you have done.

    Of course it would be better if you just had the olefactory sensation precursor - as long as it was something like frangipani or chocolate and not something horrible like ... well I'' let pick something horrible :) like Brut aftershave perhaps

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  26. Actually, I do get the olefactory precursor, but it isn't my pick of one smell. I notice absolutely every smell, and like you point out, some smells are better than others. I don't think it's only intelligent people who get migraines, and not every intelligent person gets them, they just have a higher amount of them than other people. My handwriting is pretty good. I wonder if that means I'm only intelligent sometimes?

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