The family had a dog when I was little. She loved me, I loved her, and that's pretty
much the way it is with dogs. She was a
rather smelly little dog to tell the truth because she spent most of her time
in the river and woods and lived outside, but I didn't care too much. Her little heart was full to bursting with
unconditional love, the only problem with that is she unconditionally loved
others too. I wanted a pet all of my
own.
I collected animals.
I tried to save motherless birds, caught critters in the woods, netted
fish... but none of them gave me the love I craved. Wild animals stay wild even if you contain them. Sure, the fish in my fish tank perked up
when I showed up, but they might've just been hungry.
Dad had a big fish tank with tropical fish. I enjoyed the bright fish but they were
Dad's, and quite frankly, not as smart as my river fish. Even so, I enjoyed going to the fish store
to look at the exotics. One day Dad
said I could pick the fish we'd take home.
Now I'm not stupid, even though I was a pretty small little kid at that
time. I could pick something out, but
unless it was something Dad felt like buying we weren't going to get it.
I picked a turtle.
If you're old enough, you'll remember the little green
turtles they used to sell. They don't
sell them any more because they carry salmonella. Damned shame. They're
adorable, and when I made eye contact through the glass it was love at first
sight for both of us.
I tugged and pulled at Dad and showed him my heart's desire. He wavered.
I could tell he was tempted to give in to me. Mom made it quite clear that turtles weren't fish. She can be just plain wrong-headed about
pets, but I am nothing if not single-minded sometimes. I wanted the turtle. I needed the turtle. The turtle wanted and needed me.
First real victory of my life was cradling my Chinese food
container with said turtle looking up at me on the ride home. Love.
It cradled my finger with its gentle claws.
Yeah, yeah, yeah parental instructions about food, water,
all your responsibility, don't blame us if it dies... blah, blah, blah. I already fed and watered the dog every day
for my nickel/week allowance. I
understood daily care. More than that,
I needed someone to care for, and the turtle allowed me to pour my love into
it.
I hunted for my turtle every day. I gave it worms, grubs, minnow, and berries. We took walks together. It basked on my forehead. I kissed it on the mouth and didn't die of
salmonella. It was the best loved
turtle ever, and I gave it the best life a captured turtle can live. I cried at the compost pile funeral years
later.
That little green turtle will always be a part of my heart. Maybe all of my turtle art is a tribute to it. This piece is cut paper and hangs on my wall where I can see it every day.
Thank you to everyone who sent out good wishes and prayers
for Danny. He is recovering, and is
doing so well they sent him home. I was
focused on my concerns for him when I was shaken this week by the sudden death
my brother's life-long friend. You can
see Gary's obit here. I can't express how sorry I am for everyone who loved
him.
