"Beard"

Do you remember the days when all men were clean-shaven?  It was kind of big thing for my dad to grow a mustache in the 70s.  It was really red, and I thought it was unnecessary, or sometimes I thought that it was like having cup but no saucer from a set of china.  I wasn’t too fussed about it since it was his face, but I was started wishing men would just stick with the standard bare face that I was used to.

It was a loopy time for men from my perspective.  I mean really – leisure suits?  Dad had one in powder blue polyester.  I liked the way the suit made his eyes blue and at least he didn’t get his hair done in a permanent.  That had to be clearly the stupidest style I’ve ever seen.  I’m all for curls when they happen in a regular way, but perfect rows of chemically-induced curls isn’t manly, I don’t care what they said about it at the time.

I was observing men going wild with a suspicious and mistrustful eye.  Dad bought a red motorcycle.  I was happy when he and Mom went away for weekend camping with other misbehaving adults, but as a child of the 60s I wasn’t all that far from white gloves at church.  It was all well and good for college kids to smoke pot and go to Grateful Dead concerts and protest wars, but I was in the first generation of kids to watch so many parents divorce and I didn’t approve – it was the destabilization of the world as I knew it.

While my parents stayed married, divorce was going on all around me.  My friends’ worlds crumbled, and nobody knew we were supposed to say stuff like “it’s not your fault”.  I said stupid stuff like “isn’t it better that your mom moved out because now there’s less yelling?”  I don’t suppose I racked up any points for appropriate sympathy.

I think it’s pretty safe to blame facial hair for all of it.  After all, look at those hippies and all the chaos they created.  It was only a matter of time before parents started copying the very people they criticized for sloppiness.  Women had the pill and didn’t have to have endless babies.  They could get out and party.  If their husbands didn’t want to play, then they could go out without them.  Women could work too, and with their own money, did they even need a husband?

Then again, the husbands were thinking that a lot of their wives weren’t any fun to go home to.  They needed male bonding at the bars, and if there were willing females there, so much the better.

I’m currently older than my dad ever was in this lifetime.  Sometimes that surprises me because how can we ever get older than a parent?  My perspective of Dad is child to adult, not adult to adult, or even older adult to younger adult.  If years create wisdom, I’m wiser now than he ever got to be, but I don't know if I feel all that wise.

AND, I'm not smart enough to figure out why comments are disappearing with Blogger lately.  Does anybody know how to fix this?  You can write me here if you've got answers.  Thanks!

I posted this art a couple years ago but it's just so obvious for "beard" I felt like I had to post it again.  For the record, I don't have a strong feeling pro or against beards.  Whatever suits the man best, but that in between stage is painful to my tender cheek :)

"Whiskers"

I’ll admit it, I’m a Scrooge.  Bah, Humbug.  I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t say to bankrupt your family on plastic toys and computer games for your kids.  I’m also pretty sure there weren’t any elves in Bethlehem, but don’t let me stop you from having your fun.  Run around and buy your presents and stick pretty bows on them.  Bake your cookies and send out cards.  I’ll put your cards on the mantle.  I’m just Christmased out.  It’s an occupational hazard.  I’ve spent years of my life making Santa Clauses and snowmen and all things red and green.

I do like some of the less than religious aspects of Christmas.  Elves at the North Pole?  C’mon, that’s just funny when discussing a religion started in the Middle East.  I only have one ornament up, and that’s of the 3 astrologers.  Someone once told me “Real Christians don’t believe in astrology!”  Really?  Then why were the 3 wise men following that star to Bethlehem?

Okay, maybe I’m irreverent sometimes, but I have to behave myself at my job for a religious organization, and can I really stay proper all the time?  God made me, so God must have a sense of humor.  Besides, the history of Christianity was a brilliant display of superior marketing abilities, and as a person who’s worked in marketing, I have to admire that.  For instance, the Celts of Europe worshipped a mother goddess.  The chauvinistic Middle Eastern religion didn’t, but hey, Jesus had a mom.  Mother Mary won the Celts over.  Pagan Germans had a thing for decorating trees?  No problem.  Now it’s a Christmas tree.  Northern Pagans wanted the sun to come back in mid-winter because it’s depressingly dark then.  They had holidays around the winter solstice.  Voila!  That’s when Jesus was born.

Those early Christian marketers weren’t really changing the Bible, they were just practical and creative.  I’ve got to admire that.  Okay, so when absorbing pagan holidays didn’t work, they had the Crusades and Conquistadors, but most people fell in line without having to kill them to save their souls in a frenzy of brotherly love, and the end result is that Christianity has been a tremendously successful religion.  It was successful because it absorbed the other religions without necessarily destroying the parts of them that the masses enjoyed.

The religions that seem to fight with each other the most are Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, which is ironic since they’re all siblings, with Abraham of the Old Testament as their common ancestor.  I’d say we should all send them to Dr. Phil for a family intervention, but he’s Christian and would probably take sides.  Maybe we should send them all to Deepak Chopra or the Dali Lama?

I think I’ll stick with thoughts of Santa Claus today instead of trying to resolve world conflicts.  At least Santa has never been associated with wars.  Even Gandalf and Dumbledore can’t claim that, so obviously wisdom and white chin whiskers aren’t the solution.  Besides, today is “Black Friday”, the day Americans go shopping, and Santa is the guy who totally understands presents.

This is really old art, but Santa hasn’t changed too much over the years.  I think the Europeans make him skinnier, but well, there’s all those Christmas cookies over here – and never mind my Scrooge-like tendencies, none of my bah humbugging applies to cookies.  There are never enough cookies!