I think I'm pretty easy to get along with. If you believe and do things differently
than me, okay. Live and let live. All I ask is that you treat me with the same
liberty. Of course, people aren't like
that. They want you to believe and do the
same as themselves, and anything other than that is seen as a challenge that
must be overcome or destroyed. I can't
change my inquisitive, questing temperament, so I imagine you can see the
difficulties I've encountered.
I was the same as a child.
I went to church every week and did my best to follow the rules, but
then they described heaven as a glimmering city with streets paved in
gold. I was horrified. There was no way I wanted to spend eternity
in a city on my knees saying endless hosannas -- without dogs! Sounded like a hell to me. My adults had an impossible task in trying
to make this sound like a reward for good behavior.
I went back home to my utopian woods and river and pondered
deeply why God wanted me to live in a city on my knees. It was just one thing of many that didn't
make sense. So, even though I'm easy to
get along with, I was sometimes called a difficult child. I suppose I still am? Perhaps we all are until the adults force us
into conformity? Then, we become the
adults forcing conformity. I don't
think any of this makes us happy.
This isn't just about religion; it's everything. Everybody says you should want to be
married. Tried that; it didn't work for
me. Everybody told me to be an
engineer. I became an artist. On and on and on. I'm sure you have your own list of "ought tos",
"have tos". What I've come to
realize is that the advice others push on us is the advice they'd like to take
themselves. It's what they want,
and they want you do it for them.
I've always thought the golden rule should be do unto others
as they would have you do unto them.
Not how you want to be treated, how they want to be treated. Otherwise, it's extraverts forcing shy
people to parties or introverts forcing extraverts to sit quietly. Or simcity civil engineers forcing me into
an eternity of their concept of heaven when I need trees and dogs.
I was asked a while ago to describe my perfect life. I spent weeks considering my answer. Eventually, I came to understand that
perhaps I'm living it. Well, keep in
mind this was before I spent so much time scrubbing my basement free of mold
and mouse poop, but still. (And for the
record, I'm still scrubbing. My
allergies won't allow me to work on it any faster.)
The point is, decide for yourself what you want, and
appreciate it when you have it. If your
ideal afterlife is a golden city, mazel tov.
I'd like to think God will provide a place in the woods for people like
me -- with dogs. And paint. I would hope that making art would count
towards my hosannas :D
